Follow @EllenGrabe Grabe's Gatherings: Bundles of Filth

Friday, February 13, 2009

Bundles of Filth

Before I became pregnant with Cailyn, I knew that having a baby would be a life altering event. I was prepared for the metamorphosis my body would endure, the sleepless nights, and all of the responsibilities that come with an infant. Never was I nervous of how to care for a newborn or how to hold or feed a baby. I had done more than my share of babysitting growing up and worked in numerous childcare centers. I purchased and read every pregnancy and childbirth book on Amazon and subscribed to Parenting magazine. I felt prepared, ready, eager, and qualified to become a mother. However, there was one item that was left out of babysitting, books and magazines.

Laundry.

Sure, I knew I would have another person's laundry to do after having a baby. I did not realize that this one little wrinkled bundle of excellence would also be a bundle of poop, puke, spit, and snot, causing it to be the equivalent of 3 little bundles of filth! Or that having a 2nd baby would be the equivalent of 6 little bundles of filth!! Why isn't this printed as a warning label somewhere? I once saw an episode of "Jon and Kate plus Eight" where an elderly neighbor lady came once a week to fold laundry. I thought to myself, now, this Kate is a stay at home mom with a set of twins old enough to learn to fold laundry, why can't they do it themselves? After Bryce came along, I gave myself a slap in the face for ever thinking that about Kate! If my two little ones is the equivalent to six little ones, Jon and Kate have the equivalent of 24 little ones! I'm starting to think that with every baby a family has, an elderly woman should pop out right after the baby and she does your laundry for you!

How, then, have I been handling this never ending laundry fiasco? I haven't. It's not that I don't do the laundry, I seem to be randomly throwing loads of laundry in every day of the week. My handicap is actually getting the laundry folded! If I do get it folded, it rarely sees the dresser drawers or inside of a closet. Our hangers hang bare and our dresser drawers will never decay. Now, our laundry baskets, those are the weaves that keep us together. The frustrating part is finding things. And I'm not just talking clothes. I have problems finding belts, and pacifiers, the floor, and sometimes my bed! Our bedroom has become a maze of laundry baskets that only we can find our way through. When company comes I try to keep our bedroom door closed to the wandering eyes, mostly of embarressment of my laundry complex. Eric and I often make our way to our bed at night, look across our room, look at eachother, and state that we need therapy.

What is the answer to this madness? I tried making it my New Year's resolution to always immediately fold and put the laundry away. That lasted 1 week. It takes a long time to fold the laundry, sort through it and put it away! It is never a task that can be accomplished without getting interrupted by a wailing child or two. Someone pooped their pants, someone needs to be fed, someone throws up (of course, creating MORE of the beastly laundry), the dog needs to be let in, Cailyn falls off the coffee table; oh how the list goes on and on and on! Isn't it more important in life to tend to your children than to tend to a few wrinkles? I would honestly hate to miss one of Bryce's charming smiles or Cailyn's wittiness because I'm stuck in a bedroom trying to find a place to fit all of our clothes. Therefore, in the basket they live, and we display our laundry complex everyday as we leave for work in wrinkled khaki's and rumpled collars.

Not everything in life can be perfect. You might be embarressed about the things in your life that you choose to let go in order to make day to day life easier. In this case, at least I can find some humor in airing my dirty laundry on the internet.

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